I’m a driver. This happened yesterday.
Those of you who know me know, I’m most often considered an “Alpha Female”. I am kind but take no shit. I heap praises upon strangers for acts of kindness whether they be random or necessitated. I have a very strong personal space bubble an never let bad vibes pop it. I am fallible as the next human being but am always strong even when I’m wrong.
That being said, I am deeply saddened and confused about my feelings, emotional response and complete breakdown I am experiencing still fro yesterday’s verbal and spacial violation.
I was horrifically verbally and spatially attack by a large man. I feel comfortable in my assumption that he suffers from mental illness as well as houselessness.
He asked me to hold for him at Hollywood TC as he was running from the sidewalk. He grabbed his sleeping bag and other belongings and rushed in and sat down closest to the front. I have a full bus at this time. After everyone was settled I took my foot off the brake and he screamed. Blood curdling scream. “I bumped my arm! Your bus hurt me!” Screaming and screaming. I made the decision to ask him to exit the bus. He screamed at me. Every expletive known at the top of his lungs. I hit LOUD AND VERBAL. While I was waiting for dispatch to call back I explained he could remove himself or wait for the police to remove him. He grabbed his things and stormed up to me yelling an screaming bent over into my space. So much so I had to lean into my side windows. He stepped off the bus still screaming at me all the horrible things.
At that moment dispatch called. In my immediate mental state I told them I was ok to drive.
As I hang up with dispatch a #75 rolls in and stops near the light. It occurred to me the guy might try to get on his bus so I pull up to his window and open my doors and say not to let that guy on who was in fact standing at the front door of the 75. The guy saw me through that bus and my bus and came running over screaming and flailing. He ran full speed to my driver side windows where I fully believed he was going to smash in the windows. I was leaned as far away as I could without letting go of the brake. He then proceeded to get as close to my windows and yell about killing me and wishing I would just die right now. He then walked in front of my bus blocking me from moving and yelled. he then squeezed between the busses by my front door and continued his attack. I looked up at the passengers in the 75 and saw them gasping in horror at the scene. He finally stepped far enough away that both busses could pull up to the light and it turned green. I of course was in the left lane and followed the north bound 75 out of the transit center.
It did not occur to me to call dispatch again. I was in flight mode. About a half hour later , not sure how to describe it, my body internally “collapsed”. I was suddenly exhausted and only thought to keep rolling. I did. I finished my last loop but made several poor decisions. Including a PA.
I am home today. My eyes are nearly swollen shut from sobbing. Me pets are fed but I’m back in bed.
I spoke with the Union Rep who relayed to my manager through an assistant manager. I called EAP. Gladys called back to check on me. And my manager called and I relayed the story again.
I’m exhausted. Thank you for reading my story. I think it has helped to write it down and share it with my brothers and sisters in blue who can relate and empathize.
Thank you again.
No comments:
Post a Comment