Trimess
Saturday, May 7, 2011
What does the 'victim' in the Chris Parker case think? See for yourself....
You are right, I am no victim. I wish I did know who was pressing these charges. I just wish I had the power to drop this case now. Chris is being tortured and humiliated for the public eye to feast their delight on for something he did not do. Every time I see some video of him with that jacket on showing he is on suicide watch, it just makes me heart sick. He does not deserve any of this.
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15 comments:
Al I'm going to say this one thing then let it go. You have a history of supporting the wrong guy (like Jim Stenger). I know you know this man (Parker). I know you have liked this man. I know that as a fellow Operator you are hurt and alarmed and ashamed and feel obligated to defend him and not to allow his actions to tar other Operators.
You are only making things worse.
Sometimes otherwise good people do very, very bad things. Just because you have seen someone in an otherwise good light, doesn't negate the bad things they do, or excuse them the scorn and condemnation that can and should do with those bad things.
Parker to all appearances (innocent until proven guilty and all that) groomed a 14 year old girl into a sexual relationship, likely uncovered by her parents. As a father of a now 16 year-old girl, both I and my wife have a hard time seeing the value of your defense of Parker. My wife's reaction (as an abuse survivor at a similar age) said it made her skin crawl - hence my cancellation of dinner.
Sometimes people do bad things, Al. Singing their praises and laying blame on their victims - well, that kind of thing doesn't make you look so good.
My own .02, friend to friend here.
-J
Jeff. I couldn't have said it better.
I'm not interested in "looking good" Jeff, I'm interested in a system of jurisprudence that is working in reverse.
Punishment before conviction is abhorrent to any person who believes in justice.
The victim here has a right to express her feelings.
Being a "minor" does not mean they have no mind or no rights, and they want this case dropped!
Nobody is defending his actions, if guilty, but the way this case is progressing is disgusting.
"You are only making things worse."
And people who disagree with my point of view have a right to do that.
I stand firm in my convictions.
I will not sit still and watch people hauled off and lynched without trial.
There hasn't been a "lynching", and using such loaded language is dramatic but irresponsible. Parker has been called to account, and will have his day in court.
You are correct that the justice system is far from perfect, but Trimet, bus drivers, parents, and underage teens aren't perfect either.
If Parker is "uncomfortable" about his situation, its something he brought on himself.
Lets see what happens next. Lets let the whole story come out.
Al,
Maybe you're right about punishment coming before a conviction, but considering your own scandal with filming passengers, your "support" is only making all of us operators looks bad. And an underage girl is too young to consent to sex, no matter what she says. Otherwise, 30 year old men could sleep with 11 year olds and claim the child wanted it.
I support your right to have your say!
However, there was no "scandal", that was another example of the bloodthirsty media looking for a way to make Trimet bus drivers look like shit.
We are not talking about an 11 year old child, we are talking about a teenager in today's world, a completely different world from the world in which most of us grew up in.
I know the young lady, quite well as a matter of fact.
I can tell you with 100% confidence that she is not damaged forever by this.
I say again, I want a conviction BEFORE punishment is meted out!
A society that permits it police and courts to decide punishment before a trial is not the sort of society we should take pride in, no matter what the crime.
(And yes, I think the execution before trial of Osama Bin Laden was a criminal act)
"I can tell you with 100% confidence that she is not damaged forever by this."
No, Al. You can't.
-J
Anon, you said:
"an underage girl is too young to consent to sex"
AFAIK there is no allegation of sex having actually occurred. From KATU -
“The basis of the sex abuse charges relate to kissing and fondling the breasts of the victim,” said prosecutor Don Rees.
I agree with Al that we should not crucify someone in the media before they have been convicted of a crime.
I also agree with Jeff that you cannot say what the long term impact will be; though it seems likely that this will have a dramatic long-term negative impact -- it almost always does.
My biggest concern, however, is that this might be a sign of a much larger problem (ex: abuse at home, by a neighbor, family member, etc) that will not be recognized and dealt with. Ultimately if there is a larger problem and it's not dealt with, then this will simply continue again and again with other men.
Once abuse survivors get wired into thinking this is what a relationship should look like, it isn't changed by the legal system. Ultimately it's only fixed through years of therapy.
Symptoms of Child Sexual Abuse
Many sexually abused children exhibit physical, behavioral and emotional symptoms. Some physical signs are pain or irritation to the genital area, vaginal or penile discharge and difficulty with urination. Victims of known assailants may experience less physical trauma because such injuries might attract suspicion (Hammerschlag, 1996).
Behavioral changes often precede physical symptoms as the first indicators of sexual abuse (American Humane Association Children's Division, 1993). Behavioral signs include nervous or aggressive behavior toward adults, sexual provocativeness before an appropriate age and the use of alcohol and other drugs. Boys "are more likely than girls to act out in aggressive and antisocial ways as a result of abuse" (Finkelhor, 1994). Children may say such things as, "My mother's boyfriend does things to me when she's not there," or "I'm afraid to go home tonight."
~~~~>None of the above applies, why can I say that?
I KNOW THE VICTIM THAT'S WHY!
Neutral party, checking in.
To Jeff, I don't see any victim-blaming from Al. Or any blaming at all, of either party.
I don't know what happened between the people involved. As best as I can see it, there are 3 possibilities:
1. Parker coerced the girl into an inappropriate sexual relationship.
2. Parker and the girl were in a mutually "agreed" upon sexual relationship, with "agreed" in quotes because a 14/15 year old can't legally consent to that, but it's possible she could have told him "I want to do this."
3. Parker never laid a hand on the girl, but his friendship with her was cause for concern for his work supervisors/her family given the age difference and legal status as a minor.
In any of those cases, the girl is absolutely not to blame. Even if #2 is what transpired, it would be Parker's responsibility to tell her "No" because it's not exactly an archaic law that you do not touch a minor, and he needs to recognize & follow that law even if she felt she was a willing participant.
I don't know what actually happened. I don't know if it was #1 (I really, really hope not, for her sake). I'm not sure if #3 is likely given what he's admitted to, such as violating the stalking order. But I think the difference between this case and the 15 year old from the motel room is that that girl refused to press charges and since she was a runaway, I'm assuming there weren't parents or guardians who could do anything about it. In this case, at least according to the news, the girl's father took out the stalking protective order, so presumably he's pressing charges and is not willing to drop them. Family members have the right to file a stalking protective order, so even if what Al posted that the girl wants the case dropped is true, it's not her decision to make if her family wants to press charges. They have the right to do that just as much as Parker has the right to defend himself in court. Since this hasn't gone to court yet, there isn't justification to rule out possibility #1 any more (or less) than there is to rule out possibility #2 or #3, even though #1 would be the worst of them.
Interesting that in the case of the criminal pimp, the 15 year old gets to decide the outcome, but in the case of Chris Parker, the 15 year old does not get to make the decision.
The real threat to the public runs free while Parker, who was no threat to the public, stays locked up on $750,000 bail.
Great system of (in)justice we have in the land of the free huh?
oh great system...
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